May this blog find you in great spirits. Below is my view on closing, ending, or saying good-bye to a relationship, group, community, etc.
What Closure means to Me
Closure to me is the beginning of the end. I do not necessarily see it as an “end” but a continuation of all experiences and knowledge gained to serve your next journey and/or process. I feel closure is all about new beginnings. It is really interesting to see one event as an end or coming together for a “close” when the experiences that you have gained allows for the start of a new journey. it is a beautiful and humorous paradox that I always look forward to. That is my philosophical approach to closure. The way I feel it in my heart is completely different. I feel anxious and uncertain when closure surfaces, and as a result, I tend to have a feeling of abandonment. This could probably be due to my experiences of not ending things “right” or things ending without my knowledge and/or inability to be “ready.” Maybe, just maybe, it could be my desire to never “end” a relationship, group, etc, as a way to avoid being completely alone (from the relationships, group, etc).
The Importance of Closure in a Group Setting
Despite my own feelings about closure, I feel closure in group settings is highly vital for many reasons. Here are my top 2 reasons on the importance of closure in a group setting. (1) The emotions, thoughts, and experiences that have simmered, boiled, and exploded throughout the process has to be “cooled off” before the group concludes. There is always a risk that you take when you allow for members to leave the group with unsettled and raw emotions in them. These are the group’s emotions that have been brought up so it is appropriate and necessary to have the group serve as a compass in redirecting these emotions to be in a grounded place. (2) Growth comes from taking in all the experiences in the group and manifest it in your day to day living. The group serves to create a “blue screen” of how it may feel or look like when engaging with other people. If the group continues for eternity, then when do you know what is reality and what is group? In other words, how do you know if its the group dynamics or the “real world” experiences that are impacting your thoughts, emotions, choices, and actions?